i used to think that it was really bad to be forgetful. because i often lose track of things, especially when theres so much going through my head. haha but then i realised that its not too bad after all. since everything seems new again. hence interesting. arrgh what am i writing (super lack of self confidence) but i shall continue tanking this text.

no i will restrain myself from calling it random and all those other derogative terms. so i will continue writing. yes.

okay what to talk about today. hmm..

ooh almost posted this on the class blog instead of here. haha.

but anyway, after a refreshing shower, i feel more inclined to chat. hehe.

ah okay. a short paragraph on chrome. apparently its this new browser that google is introducing. to takeover microsoft! wahaha.

not really. buts its supposed to be alot more convenient in terms of loading time and stuff. not to mention it can supposedly eliminate the use of microsoft office (which i have yet to obtain). yay.

end. okay what next ^^

talk about how my study break (haha its a giant oxymoron) went. inner debate going on on whether it would appear as overly ego.

but hell its my blog and i don't need to justify myself. so there.

*regrets instantly for typing um. not so refined stuff.*

but then i'd rather post what im thinking rather than continually censor stuff out so i can present a super good image. no point censoring and censoring and beautifying etc. until it becomes like some kind of model gp essay. haha. not to mention it will really make blogging super sian. and make this blog really really hard to maintain.

and it is by the way. but not to an unbearable degree. and i do reap benefits :) of what sort i'll leave it to you.

*forgets totally about talking about study break and goes off to talk about other stuff*

i guess maintaining a blog is something like uh. raising a pet. kinda. well not really. but you get the idea right. haha.

'cause when i was on my mega hiatus in sec 3 or 4, i thought there was really nothing to write about. and so i didnt want to like. post substandard stuff. that i wouldn't like to read. but now i've found out that i just have to keep trying. and at some point of time, the words will just flow. like now. haha.

awkward start initially, but at least im typing fluently now. like whatever comes to my mind appears in front. oh so magical! ~♥

oh no. bad effect. but shall battle on!

the end of the holidays approach. and im kinda anticipating school again. i wonder why ^^

in any case, there's only about slightly more than a year left. so i hope everyone can cherish everyone else more. haha.

oh yes, and i was watching this advertisement on tv. the leap years. you know? that movie? i think its some sort of love story. not the main point.

well the key thing about that movie is that the main characters, correct me if im wrong, made some sort of pact to meet every 4 years on 29th feb. which occurs once every 4 years.

i think 08s63 should meet every day. or every month at least. but life goes on. so perhaps yearly would be enough. haha.

*chnk. next topic*

i faintly remember that when i was young. my bro and sis and me would sob and whine everytime we were on the way back from holiday. well im long past the age of sobbing and tantrum-throwing already. but grr i still wish sometimes that some things can carry on forever. its this painful yearning like:

ahh i dont want to leave no no make time stop please i want to stay

and a whole lot of other stuff.

but now i look back and know that if time had really stopped there and i could lets say. stay at some theme park forever. i'll be missing out on so much more. like when i had uh. so much fun in korea that i wanted to stay forever. then i would have missed out on jc life and who knows what later on. of which alot will be just as or even more memorable than a korea trip.

so i want to make sure i make alot of pleasant memories here. while time lasts. because we all know that time is short. and there's no turning back.

oh and i suppose far worse than yearning for something that's already lost is yearning for something that has yet to, or may never come.

okay so some background. (wow this looks like a long post) i used to read like crazy in primary sch and lower sec. like every week 4 books of > 700 pages? trains your speed reading. but anyway.

i moved on to reading online novels. chinese ones. in upper sec. then i would keep reading chapter after chapter filled with text. and i would try to find completed novels. because i cant stand waiting for the writer of incomplete ones to come out with the next chapter one week later.

but in both cases, it would lead to this dreadful sense of loss at the end. something like a mild depression which would fade the following morning. for both the books and online novels, i would then try to find the next book in the series to keep on reading. alas, more often than not the online novels were one-shot pieces.

example. his majesty's dragon. thats a book i read. uh. 2 years? ago. i haven't been to the library in ages. i guess there are what. 5 books in the series now? though i've only read 3. because the 4th came out 2 years ago, and the 5th in hardcover in the US in july this year. don't think singapore libraries will stock up on them any time soon.

well its about a dragon called temeraire and his rider lawrence. its really quite a good read imo. you can wiki it for more info. to my great surprise, wiki has almost everything. gosh. i was (and still am) in awe.

background end. must stop digressing further. so right. that inexplicable sense of depression ostensibly comes from that wish to keep living someone elses life. watching someone else's story unfold. to escape from the sheer boredom of reality. thats for me la. and it really got abit too much sometimes. so much so that it was perhaps a blessing that all the crazy workloads and stuff put an end to my obsessive reading. so i could carry on with life in general.

time flies when one's obsessed. well it appears so. maybe i'll post again someday yiren's theorem on why time appears to fly when one's having fun. haha.

till next time then.

but somehow, i still feel that something is just..lacking. sigh.