since i last posted, my flu has gotten better.

will not go into graphic detail.

it was very uncomfortable throughout though. especially in the mornings.

... apart from that, i somehow don't really feel good about going to school. its nothing about cca, still enjoy going for it, even till late into the evening. its more of being rather uncomfortable in a classroom environment. people around. perhaps its a temporary thing. perhaps its a phase.

hopefully it won't last long, in any case.

haha somehow heart > mind currently. must think rationally. even though it may be rather painful now.

plenty of time for all the other leisure stuff later.

though i hope that one chance isn't all i get, i kinda hope that more opportunities will come. they should, technically.

but then again, life doesn't always give you what you want. more often than not, it doesn't. personally, i don't trust in all the old sayings like "make lemon juice out of the lemons life gives you": you don't really have a choice. eat the lemon or make juice, it's the same thing.

that's probably why sometimes my steps are unsure, so unstable, even though it is certain that i probably won't be able to do a thing about certain facts in life. especially if it involves outside factors that i can't change.

cannot falter now. too much is at stake.

.... i just hope things will turn out for the best. better than it is now, in any case.