*whines*

must be that time of year again. the wind is chilly, the night looks pitch dark (probably because all the sec + pri sch ppl are sleeping early since sch has started), and im all riled up about homework.

hah i'll fire up myself tmr!

*looks at the massive pile of stuff from my drawer that's preventing the room door from closing*

so ironic. huangcheng and hw. huangcheng is the lesser of the two evils. oh well.

nvmnvm. must work hard for next year.

haha feeling quite confused now. but can't really sense it amidst this haze of bleariness. tired tired.

perhaps sleeping soon will cure this confusion. hmm..

don't really know but personally, im\ dont think im ready to face the new year (the new school year). got alot of commitments, alot of studies, alot of relationships (hey normal ones okay. dont 想入非非), alot of tangles to sort out.

no doubt, it'll be a busy year.

will not let matters of the heart -> 私事 get in the way of anything next year. not in the way of mugging, not in the way of huangcheng. nothing.

survival is priority next year. primarily for huangcheng. of similar significance (more actually) is A's.

walao why must mug?!?!

sadly its a fate that everyone has to undergo.

so i'm all geared up. though i dont feel ready at all. nvm. things should turn out well. should turn out well.

so sad that although im supposed to be able to blog about all sorts of secrets and stuff here. i still must maintain a level of self control.

some things can't be written down.

some can only be said.

some can't even be said.

damn. just happens to be the stuff that you can't say which you most want to say.

but that's just life i suppose.

questioning purpose and all that doesn't seem to have a use for now. since i don't really know where i'm going.

to a certain extent i do have a rough gauge of whats going on, but it isn't clear as of yet.

therefore, im going to avoid entering into anything serious or permanent for now. will wait till after NS. when i have more freedom and am hopefully more mature to tackle issues.

meanwhile, its a painful wait.

but all the way! i'll get there someday. like how i got here.

we'll just have to see how things turn out.